It would be an understatement to say that moving house can be hectic. As one of life’s top stressors, moving any distance can see you bogged down by paperwork, important dates, and, of course, endless packing.
While you’ll want to make this move easier for the whole family, all of this moving-based work could see you neglecting things like your child’s feelings during this period. As a result, children are often dragged along to a new home without necessarily feeling they’ve had a say or have had the opportunity to say goodbye to their old town in any real way.
This increases the chances that your child will struggle to cope with the move, and could see them acting out, or failing to make friends when you finally land in your new location. That’s terrible news, but it’s a fate you can avoid by simply clearing your workload and mind, and instead taking your child on these vital trips to help them adjust.
Trip 1: A Weekend in Your New Town
It’s not always a great idea to take kids along to a first viewing of a potential property. But, failing to introduce them to their new living situation in advance could have a catastrophic impact on their ability to settle.
But we know what you’re thinking – you’re in the process of moving. You definitely don’t have time for a weekend away, are we mad?! Not at all. In reality, there are steps you can take to free up at least a little time, even as your moving date draws near. Enlisting help from friends and family, and also simplifying your moving prep with the help of a trusted solicitor or moving company, will all buy you time. And, a trip to your new town with your child would be a great use of that time.
During this visit, arrange a viewing of your new property, and stay in an exciting part of town where your child can drink up the local culture, and see all of the best things to do. That way, when it comes to moving, they’ll have something to look forward to and will be far more familiar with their new environment.
Trip 2: A Visit to Their Favourite Restaurant
Often, the feeling of absent parents during a move can be as disorienting for a child as the move itself. After all, your kids are probably used to having your undivided attention. When you’re suddenly always on your phone or are constantly talking about the move, that new house can start to feel like an unwanted new sibling. And, having your kids feel jealous of their new home is no way to get them on board.
To avoid this, it’s important you still take time together as a family, and visiting your child’s favourite restaurant is a great way to achieve that. It also gives your child a chance to say goodbye to their favourite local haunts before you all head off. Even better, a night off doesn’t require you to let moving prep fall by the wayside.
To make your child feel special, try to lay some ground rules for this meal, such as a phone ban, or a ban on mention of anything to do with your move. Instead, try to make this feel like any old family meal out, and remind your child that you’re here, even if you have a lot of other stuff going on.
Tip 3: A Playdate With Friends
Moving away from friends at a young age can be a real blow. But you’ve got the move to think about, putting you at real risk of ending your child’s friendships in rushed goodbyes at the school gate after their last day. This is NOT the way to go about things and could see your child feeling particularly disjointed and lonely.
To avoid that, help your child say goodbye in the right way with a proper playdate that sees them spending dedicated, quality time saying goodbye to their top friends. Try to arrange this playdate after your child’s last day of school, so that it provides some great closure for them.
Fantastic playdate options in this instance could include a sleepover, a day out at a local attraction (more on that later), or a small goodbye party with a select handful of people. In each instance, your child is sure to appreciate these goodbyes, and can also take this time to collect contact details, and even make arrangements for future meetups. All of which will help them to feel less alone when moving day comes.
Tip 4: A Tourist in Your Old Town
When we live in a place, we often don’t visit things like the local tourist attractions that see visitors travelling for miles. We’ve been there and done that, after all. Or, we haven’t but just don’t see that attraction after so many years of driving past.
In reality, though, being a tourist in your old town can help your kids get this place out of their system, as well as giving them a more dedicated reason to come back in the future. So, take a little time to visit things like that local museum you’ve walked past for years, or that restaurant that’s always packed with tourists. Have fun discovering the aspects of your town you simply never knew. Then, feel more secure in saying goodbye without your kids feeling that they’ve missed out, or that they didn’t take full advantage of their time here.
Any move with kids can be tough, and you should take steps to help them settle in their new town. But, if you have a move on the horizon, you just might find that taking these trips saves your child from the worst post-move feelings. It may seem like a hassle when you have a lot to do, but that effort will soon pale in comparison to the joy of seeing your kids thrive once they find their feet in your new location.